If I thought my faith depended on feeling cheerful, I’d be worried.
Faith is easier when my emotions are in sync with my reason. So is acting as if what I believe matters. Emotions can tell me that something needs attention, but “…conscience is a law of the mind….” (Catechism, 1777–1782)
The last two nights were as close an approximation as I’ve achieved. Maybe tonight will be better.
The good news is that the family hasn’t had a major medical incident over the last week or so. Stress can help folks experience insomnia. “Help?” Never mind.
I’m still dealing with habits and response patterns developed during decades of depression. That gets me back to faith, feelings, and making sense. Sort of.
Depression, the sort I still deal with, is a disorder; not a choice. There’s a ‘spiritual’ angle to it, but ‘exorcising demon depression’ doesn’t make sense.
Depression isn’t my only psychiatric issue. PTSD has been part of the mix since I was 12. Today’s parents or family doctors often spot signs of autism spectrum long before kids reach their teens.
I quoted the first part in September. (September 24, 2017)
I don’t feel like it sometimes. Physical and psychiatric issues could seem like excuses for griping, grousing and grumbling. But I can remember reasons for rejoicing, no matter where my emotions are at the moment.
Living in this wonder-packed universe is near the top of my list. So is the best news humanity’s ever had. God loves each of us, and wants to adopt us. (John 3:17; Ephesians 1:3–5; Catechism, 52, 1825)
I can, however, say something about prayer. It’s a gift of grace, and something I can’t do unless I decide it’s worth the effort. (Catechism, 2725)